My Tech Blog

Getting tired of everything in my life being poison pilled.

He’s got a good friend. Use their name against him.

A beautiful day? He sounds like my dad.

Art? You know what he is doing with that.

Sinatra? Great musician, but

Want to use a new product? Not so fast, read this 1000 page contract

Sick of all this. Let me enjoy the time I have left on this earth.

I liked a woman. She didn’t respond. I liked another woman after time passed and still had unanswered questions.  Did I want to fall for more than one? No. Did I? Yes. Will wasting my time add more support for any of us? No.

Two loyal women to help fend off attacks like this? Sounding pretty damn good right now. The mess that brings with American cultural norms? Let them have it but don’t let them enjoy it. Can I make room for different yes. Can everyone make room for different types? Love the people you disagree with.

Do I want to make someone else jealous when I spend time with someone I care about? No. Is it nice having some free time when people go to work? Yes. Do I want people to feel like I care about them less because of that? No.

Don’t look back. Don’t you ever look back. If you look back we are through. What if they are on the side of the road? Her or me.  If you talk to her you prove you never loved me. If you talk to her I will talk to him. He talked to her guess I can do what I want. Knowing both sides.  Feels not so pretty. He was there for her during the dark days.  She might not be here if it wasn’t for him.  I could lose her but I have to trust her.  She’ll probably hate me if I try and stop her. Eliminate possibility of problems, eliminates relationships. Lock them in the tower.  They’ll love you for it?  Fine go to the bar, drink all you want. You’ll probably end up cheating on me. They did it before they’ll do it again.  Labels, judgement, and freedom.  Fleeting opportunities.  What is said and what is left unsaid.  But if they just told me.  If they did, would you love them for it?  Prisons without direct sunlight better? Why does our state allow that?

Two beautiful flowers. Give sunshine to one and crush the hopes and dreams of the other? Decide? All things possible with God’s help. You must proceed. People at the front door and people at the back door.  We can’t use the helipad? Budget cuts.  I like my cards, but I want the other’s at the table to win. Maybe I’ll get another great hand in the future. But it’s your turn to shine.  God will make it up to me. Not sure when or how.

My candle going out does not stand for war with any nation or person.  It signifies war against those demons preventing reconciliation and forgiveness.  I will turn it back on once there are answers.  I don’t know who, what, or why. Time for some problems to be fixed.

People change over time.  People also don’t always have the right words or experiences in life to match up correctly.  We make mistakes and we don’t have the knowledge or proper level of mercy to deal cordially with each other.  When we are young our experiences are vastly different and I and probably some others might have been less prone to being merciful.  When we don’t have real conversation there is no way to truly know what happened.  Things just don’t work out and we don’t know why.  

People don’t tell the truth to people they don’t think will be merciful to them.  Whether that is true or not isn’t always known.  We judge others to be unable to properly handle the truth.  Some relationships probably didn’t work out because I hadn’t experienced enough to be less judgmental.  They didn’t have the right words to convince me otherwise.  And they judged that I was unable to handle the truth.  Others with their own self interests might have the right words and choose not to because of their own problems and their own agendas.  

People labeling each other based upon where they were earlier in life doesn’t take into account that they have the ability to make positive changes.  When we see things continuously not working out we think others might have labeled us when they did not. Leave anyone in silence long enough and they start formulating their own ideas on what happened and why it happened.  The sad truth is judgmental people need more support and not less.  The sad truth is those that lie and steal and cheat need more support and not less.  Yes, it can be bad for us. Is it better to lose them in the long run?  Yeah their currently a tyrant, but their our tyrant.  Help me with the right words.

Figuring this all out sideways is lame. Figuring out that many don’t have our best interests at heart is lame too.

Finally some people are just different.  God made us all different.  I wish we could all work together for the better of all.  I wish we all agreed on how best to make that happen.  I wish some choices didn’t require compromises.  Compromises that leave anyone in society in silence and misery not really treating them like they wish to be treated.  Figure it out without support is annoying.  Being setup to fail is lame.  The Bible says a lot.  A man that prays for support while feeling like they are getting no direct support really doesn’t lead him to want him to read more.  Oppression can prevent people from speaking up.  If we talk to them they will think this about us.  Then we’ll be left out in the cold.

Likely some stuff might have been going on I didn’t know about before.  I also might not have had the mercy and love to handle what they told me properly.  Others might not have had the right words to say to me.  Was I easy to be talked to, no.  Did I believe more was going on than what I saw on the surface? No. Could they have spoken up and let me know, without problems added to their life? Possibly. Is better for them better for me? Not always.  Is there no consequences to silence and not speaking up? Sadly no.  Speaking up isn’t always about what is best for us. Sometimes it is about saving them.  Saving their heartache, their problems, years of misery.  Do we always make the right choices? No.  No room for forgiveness and correction that doesn’t involve a jail cell? Doesn’t seem very wise to me.

Deal with it.  Silence or support depending on how you read it. I mean this to be support.  Not I make this mean, so they support more.  Less support can make people meaner.  So now expect them to support more?  Not always about what is best for us.

Justice feels good when we get it at least initially.  Hurts when it is done to us improperly. It is addictive though, easy to overstep our bounds.  Can’t stop at just the people that wronged us so much, now we have to go for those that lied to us when they were just protecting themselves.  Others can lead us down the wrong paths.  We can over step our bounds.  Now justice can be done to us.  Doesn’t feel too good. I must return fire not knowing all the facts? Screw that. I must return fire on those lead down the wrong path by a society that failed them? Screw that.  There are times where defusing situations require less than optional solutions.  Better to work together to reduce those.

Got it in for anyone? No. Get all right all the time? No. We don’t need mercy too? No? Labels past statute of limitations? Screw that.  People that stop trusting their support need less people to talk to? Screw that.  Unmerciful people left to their own devices?  Screw that.

Sitting on an iceberg watching the titanic float by. They will get what they deserve? How about everyone else? Silence their voice and then expect them to speak up when it matters to us? Shh, nobody wants to hear that.  Decisions can diverge our paths, but it should not silence them.  Labeled for silence.  Because we wanted the system to fail. Wait that’s not what we want? Better speak up.  Didn’t have the healthcare I needed? Didn’t speak up? You mean you did? They were understaffed and overworked too? Everyone else just watched? We can’t figure out a solution that doesn’t leave them in silence? It’s our way or the highway? Not oppression of its own? Only silence it is the only way.  They know what they did, figure it out. Silence it is the only way.  Silence it is the only way. Why is nobody speaking to me?

Mercy and forgiveness. Because silence is a cold wind on a dark night.  But they said they didn’t want to speak to me.  People can’t change? No room for error? They will talk to me if they want to. If they can? Because oppressive forces aren’t stopping him?  Because oppressive forces aren’t stopping her? Can’t say I will have the right words.  Have a little faith. Every time I try to speak up things just get worse.  

The Devil likes to divide and conquer.  Scale up both sides and reduce forgiveness.  More than two sides to an argument possible? Not only possible, many times probable. Factors matter. Individual decisions can be wrong, and the combination gives a good reason to be merciful. They said it, they might not have said it the way I wanted, but thank God they did.  They fixed it, maybe jerry rigged with some duct tape but it saved us all.  It ain’t always pretty but thank God its there. Better not always perfect.  They bought us some time, now let’s find a way to make it right. I want to help but I don’t know how.  They did it wrong.  I did it right the first time?  

Encourage their good traits.  Support for life. Play up their bad traits, makes it worse for us all.  Yes what we don’t say matters too.  Better to be thankful for what we do say. It’s a compliment though not what I was looking for.  The worst kind of red head, the one that goes for the non red heads. No room for different?  Would you want to date that guy in the mirror? No, but they aren’t me. Maybe more muscles.  A giant without restraints? Could they handle being a giant? Not without support. Yes they could handle it but I want her, so let’s stop that. They aren’t perfect yet, they can’t handle it. Who is? Who can without support? Patch it up it will buy us some time. But don’t forget about it. The world is complex and ever changing. I forgot about that. I forgot to fix that too long. Nobody filled the void? They might have, but we labeled them. Dammit we meant it for good and they used it for bad. We tried to tell you. I wasn’t getting tons of fast balls at the same time? I wasn’t a chemical piñata at the time? We didn’t protect the guys there trying to solve the problems and fix our health? Hard to make ends meet when labeled. Less than optimal solutions collide.

Permanent silence not an optimal solution.

Knowledge is power.  To those who have been given much will be expected.  Those that haven’t seen the real oppressions in our system are easier to forgive, because they had no knowledge of it.  Those that have seen the oppressions first hand owe it to our children and our children’s children to fix those problems we see in the system and the world.

Mercy for the merciful.  And what mercy is it to leave those problems to all our children?  Wait they mistreated me and now I have to fix it?  That’s not fair.  Life isn’t fair, but we can try to make it better for all.

It’s 3 PM.  He’s regular. Leave a bowl of ice cream on his desk with a corn on the cob. He’ll get a kick out of that.

What? Who did this? Your fired.  You insult all the people in Iowa that grow corn with this? But they said you thought it would be funny. If they said jump off a cliff would you do it?  If they said give comfort to the broken hearted and feed the poor would you do it? Yes.  Hmm.  Maybe I should keep you around after all.

We knew he would say this so we planned accordingly.  Oh their using a super computer to predict my plans?  Maybe I need to start flipping a coin. If they know they can predict me they will. That’s a temptation and woe be to the tempter.  Maybe better to keep them guessing. Maybe what they want me to do isn’t always best.  Maybe our prediction model isn’t perfect after all. But that goes against the narrative! The narrative adds value up to a point.

Follow the trustworthy voices up to a point, and no further.  Driving up to a cliff to see the view is nice.  But don’t drive further.  Easy to get that wrong? Yes. Mercy? Yes.

Maybe 30 years from now we will all be writers. I don’t like where he is going with this. “Progress requires experimentation”? Silence the only way he’ll learn? But we have to test the process. Even if the process makes people miserable? How do we know if the process works? Is the person or the experiment more valuable? But if we show our face other’s might find out where we are. We’re trying to help him and he thinks we’re experimenting on him and third parties might be trying to throw us under the bus. What do we do? Can’t always protect ourselves and others at the same time. Not always easy to know when to let down our guard. I would be less miserable with more support and I understand if others cannot give it to me right now. If your oppressed, I am sorry. Wish I knew a way to show people a better way. Maybe there is mercy for the merciful. Sure doesn’t feel that way sometimes. Protect yourself first, I don’t want you lost over something trivial. Please talk to me when it is safer. Not because it is easy.

If Christ was in the room with the people watching an execution on the electric chair how would He feel? He saw the person born. The joy in his mother’s eyes. The way society mistreated and lead him down the wrong path. He knows all the sins of those sitting in the room with him. All those things done in secret, that the person next to them knows nothing about. He loves them and knows they are making a mistake. Put away your stones.

Tempt them past the point of wanting the death penalty. Then show them what they missed 5 years down the line. This is the way the devil works.

They were served shit for breakfast, shit for lunch, and now you want me to feed them shit for dinner? Can’t go back in time and fix breakfast and lunch, but maybe dinner can be better. Bad start, bad life up to this point, a light going forward? Beats the alternative.

I like science and technology, architecture, and music. I don’t want to be part of creating systems designed to destroy people or make their lives miserable.  Problem is it is not always easy to see what technologies always add value or which will be used for evil purposes.  Medicine or a car could be misused by those with nefarious purposes. Most technologies could be used in an evil way. 

Another problem is we all don’t always agree on what is better.  Better for me better for others? Better for others better for me?  Better for others equals better for them? In an ideal world none of us would have to worry about ourselves.  I have tried to live this way and have ended up on the street.  Those oppressed might not be able to help when the going gets tough.  Is it wise to give to a point that your life becomes in jeopardy?  Is it wise not to account for a fallen world?  Could we use this as an excuse not to help those in need?  Are we more effective with our health or trying to help people when we have several health and other problems?  Is it wise to drive a car with three wheels?  Is it not wiser to fix the missing wheel first?  Maybe a sunroof and leather seats might make the drive a little more comfortable too. A couple super models and a briefcase full of cash could make the drive more comfortable. Now imagine only fixing the wheel.  Only water and bread for the drive.  Gets the job done, but could I be more effective with a cup of coffee?  The three legged dog might pull you out of a burning car.  Makes for a good movie but in reality does it work out that way? Forcing people with Chron’s disease to stay in the office wiser? They are going to the bathroom an awful lot, I better comment on that. Maybe wiser not to.

Maybe the idea is we all have different ideas of what it takes to be happy.  I think we all want support too. If we thrive off the losses of other people’s support, we will likely lose our own.  If we lose our support and see others with more it can make us jealous. Maybe others have more because of hard work and dedication yet when they have profited off a system that has oppressed us that hurts.  In a fallen world there seems to always be a certain level of oppression.  Not always easy to understand what level of profit has been obtained through hard work and what profit has been obtained off the backs of others.  Those with more might think they don’t owe anybody anything.  Nobody helped them off the street.  They easily forget all the days of clean water, crimes that were prevented, and love and support they were given. Maybe it didn’t feel that way when someone they loved left them.  Always a reason to be thankful, and sometimes big heartaches can make it harder to see.

One of the problems with The USA.  We are seen as those with more.  Yet many of us are just fighting to survive.  Those with less might see us as turning our backs on them.  Some might profit off the illusion.  Some might use this as a way to get us to stop working together.  Want to destroy any system, take away it’s ability to correct its errors.  No forgiveness and reconciliation.  It destroys friendships, relationships, marriages, states, nations and alliances.  Mercy and forgiveness, because the alternative hand cuffs us to a train that will take us off a cliff.  

Do I want to be cheated on? No.  Can I forgive someone that cheated on me? Yes. Do I want to have to forgive them when we could have made better choices in the first place? No. Do I want to be married to someone that continuously cheats on me? No.  Would I still want them to be successful and happy? Yes.  Is taking away their support likely to make them cheat more? Yes. Will cheating push us to look for better options? Likely. Is taking away their support going to help make them more successful and happy? Not likely.  So they cheated on me and now I am supposed to increase their support? Yes, didn’t say it was easy.  But that encourages it to continue.  Enablers. Nay sayers, they will be there when the going get tough?  Increase the right kind of support, while simultaneously steering away from the problem and fixing your own problems that you have less time for because now your dealing with this. You must proceed. The great thing about science, I know a way it could happen, so I can be merciful. Doesn’t mean I want it to happen.  

Is it fair to label any a cheater for life? No.  Once a sinner, always a sinner? Do we always agree upon what sin is? No. Sins of omission could easily doom us all. We didn’t see it because we chose not to see it.  We were just trying to survive can’t put that on us. We missed it because we were working on something else. What else was so important? People, if it were easy for everyone to work together we would all do it.  Mercy and forgiveness makes it easier to work together.  Mercy and forgiveness because without it, it is like running a car without oil. Might run for a little while, then it all breaks to shit.  People are at different places in the journey.  Forgivable for some might not be forgivable for all yet. Let everyone know everything equals wise? Unforgiving intelligence with unlimited wire taps wise?

They look like they have more.  They can handle the extra problems. Wait they had health problems that aren’t being fixed and they are leveraged? I didn’t see that.  Why didn’t they tell me? Could they tell you?  What might happen if they did. I just operated on what I knew. And they operated on what they knew. But I am still mad because it hurt me.  Yes, but knowing they had problems of their own makes me feel better? Now I feel bad for getting mad in the first place.  So hurt because of the loss and now hurt for being mad about the loss in the first place. Damnit I can’t seem to win, why should I try in the first place. God accounted for their success, yet my dreams left to the dust?

That’s how it is.

That’s how it is?

That’s how it’s going to be?

We can’t make it better?

Let’s make it better.

Let’s make it right.

Their supercomputer model said this would be better. Our supercomputer model said that would be better. The fatal flaw we allowed more than one model? The fatal flaw our models didn’t match God’s model? God can’t account for multiple supercomputers? Always listen to the intel? No room for mercy when plans don’t match? Any man made system perfect for all scenarios? No.

Not an excuse to not make it right. Not an excuse to not be merciful or forgiving.

Always room for love and mercy? Yes

They came from a broken family so we had mercy on them, but you knew better. The problem with that? Their problems mattered to us and your problems didn’t. Love, mercy, and support for all better. Just because one wheel squeaks louder doesn’t mean the other’s don’t have problems too. Trying to fix all wheels at the same time makes things more complicated. Have a little mercy on those trying to fix the problems. Too many cooks in the kitchen a problem. Too few with too many orders also a problem. More problems more reason for mercy. “More money more problems”. So more money equals more mercy?

Be more merciful to the wealthy? Give more money to those that hurt me? Depends on return on investment? Yes, Yes, and Yes. Good return on investment can help us help more in the future. Getting people to a point that they can provide good return on investment requires support. Doesn’t seem like it makes sense but it does. “Oh we got a wise guy eh?” We got a job for you. Since when?

If we spend our time dragging up the past on impeaching old presidents.  We lose.  There are likely some that are profiting from these kind of trials.  That money could be better spent on helping those in the poorer communities and hardest hit by the pandemic.  Other countries that have governments that can work together and agree to get work done will outperform us fast if we don’t all learn to work together.  Do we want to work together to make a better economy and fix the environment?  Do we want to make things better for all nations?  Or do we want to bicker between ourselves until we see a once great nation crumble to dust?  

Find a way to work with Russia.  Find a way to work with China.  Find a way to work with The Middle East. And Africa, and South America, all of Asia, all the islands, and all Central and North America.  Because when our neighbors do better we do better too. Centralize the wealth in The USA, and people will flock to an already overrun system.  So how do we help make the world better for all people? Because it will make it better for us.  Automation centralizes wealth, we need to find a way for all people to profit from it.

Dangerous – warning

Danger owe us – protection

Dangerous – attractive, not boring

Think the best in others.  Maybe they warned you or encouraged you and you read it the wrong way.  Sometimes only time for a few words.  Inflection matters, concern matters.  People might be withholding information as well.  I want you protected and I don’t want to sell them out.  More words less ambiguity.  Less ambiguity safer in some cases.  No mystery can be more boring.  Some can use this combination as a tool to discredit. They took the bait.  Protecting yourself and your team admirable, but at the expense of me? That’s not how we meant it. We were in trouble and just trying to survive. I understand, those younger or without this knowledge might not. Don’t load them up with too many burdens. Sometimes we are the most unmerciful with ourselves, specially at a young age.

Don’t teach people a lesson and forget to care about and protect them

Would I date someone that is leveraged? Yes

Do I want the woman I date to be leveraged? No

Lots of good reasons to be angry

Is she trying to make others lives better or worse?

I don’t want to date someone in the queue you label you for destruction field.

People get caught up and leveraged, my goal get them out of that

Anger and revenge are like being hand cuffed to a train

Most problems can be stopped without the use of deadly force or war

Too much reliance on one tool like the sword might make us think we can solve all problems with it.  In self defense cases I realize reduced time can cause people to use non optimal solutions.  No preparation beforehand can lead to misuse of tools.

I saw a TV show about a judge talking to a guy.  A powerful show saying the guy not only bought the knife, he equipped it then took it to a bar, and committed the crime.  Distinct choices at multiple steps in the process that could have been stopped.  Going to go drink? Don’t bring a weapon, alcohol can make for bad choices. Bad choices don’t always mean just our own choices.  Do we care about others? We need to account for their bad choices too.  Do we love each other enough to stop problems before they start?  Sometimes we add value to a situation and sometimes we don’t.  People need support.  When we label people by the places they go or the people they talk to, they stop wanting to talk to those people.  Do we love people enough to talk to them when it doesn’t look good for our image?

Add this all together? Now what do I do?  

Do I want to promote racism? No.  

Do I think starving people I disagree with will make them better? No.  

Do I want to risk my lively hood or well being to talk to someone? No. Will I? Yes.  Because silence isn’t a real path forward.  

Do I want to go to a bar when I have to drive to get there? No.

Am I perfect? No.

Do I add value to situations? I would like to think so.  Do I always know when I am not adding value? No. Do I need support to help tell me and show me? Yes.

Can silence be a sign of affirmation? Yes.

Can silence be a sign of that I am making a mistake? Yes. 

Can people give me wrong signs based on personal agendas? Yes.

Is it wise to listen to all? Yes and No. Is it wise to listen to none? Depends. Do they care about others and me?  Even if their intentions and agendas are good, will the result be beneficial?  Sometimes trying to fix problems we can remove the support we rely upon to keep a roof over our head.  

While I can understand this, that doesn’t mean I will always make the best choices.  Do I think the combination of good decisions and hard work leads to a better tomorrow? Yes. Does it guarantee anything in a fallen world? No.  Should that prevent us from trying? No.  So I work and I build and if you all see me going down the wrong path I would appreciate a heads up.  I realize I won’t agree with everyone on everything. Doesn’t mean I don’t want them to prosper.  Love your enemies.  Because by the roll of a dice I could be in their shoes.

Silence can build faith and leadership.  I think there might be a more optimal solution.  Silence is a tool.  Cutting off people’s support is a tool.  Cutting off a person’s hand is a tool. Oppression is a tool.  Different levels yet all can be a huge problem.  Permanent solutions are like removing an eraser from the pencil.  

With the amount of unknowns in the world, we are all similar to children.  Do we take away children’s ability to correct mistakes? I don’t think that is wise. Permanent labels and silence are a huge problem.  Why? Because it is similar to the death penalty.  Forgiveness or six feet under.  Because forgiveness and mercy isn’t always about what is best for me.  Though it beats having that on my conscious going forward.  

Mercy for the merciful and for the unmerciful. Because mercy will be given to the merciful, and I want mercy in my own life, and we all can be tempted past the point of wanting to be merciful.  Love your enemies.  My enemies are the sins of the unmerciful.  Tyranny of the individual and tyranny of the masses both need to be stopped.  Not the person, the sin of being unmerciful to our brother’s and sisters.  On all sides of the isle.  On all sides of the fence.  On all sides of the pond. In all parts of the world.  From young to old.  From top to bottom.  Because God made us all, and I want tomorrow to have you all prosper in it.

 If a woman cheats on her husband.  Do you tell the husband?  What if the husband is unmerciful and unforgiving?  Is that played up so it can be used as an excuse to not tell them the truth? What if the truth comes out another way? Now they don’t trust us because we didn’t choose best for them.  

No truth can be damaging.  All truth can get people hurt too.  What do you do? Why didn’t you tell us immediately?  I can’t handle the truth or how I handle the truth isn’t how you want me to handle the truth?  Agenda for good? Who’s good?  All’s good, my good, your good, or their good? It’s simple? Just tell the truth?  In a world that is completely forgiving, merciful, and non oppressive – truth is the best route.  What world do we live in?