My Tech Blog

Systemic oppression leads to language convolution.  Language convolution allows for systemic oppression.

People that can’t speak freely find creative ways to say things and communicate information under the radar.  When people convolute meanings the wrong people can be blamed for actions and people trying to communicate information can use it to hurt others.  A bit of a catch 22.

Speak freely and people can get hurt.  Don’t speak up an people can get hurt.

If we don’t want our words misconstrued don’t create a systemic oppression.  People in jeopardy and people that just want to better themselves can both convolute meanings to help their cause.

Don’t lie. Don’t lie to the people trying to hurt you and your family?

Excessive surveillance can get people killed.  Some surveillance can save lives.  People terrorized by surveillance can take and use it against those putting surveillance on them.

Ideally we all speak freely and think better of each other.  In this environment it is difficult to say the least.  Some creative word play can inspire ideas, or get people to think green to help save the planet.  Other word play can make people’s lives a living hell.

Part of the problem is people believe the end justifies the means.  This can leave a wake of destruction on the pursuit of a better tomorrow.  There should be lines not to be crossed.  Though when others are crossing lines this can be exceedingly difficult.

Do we choose to fight today? How do we choose to fight today?  Is the battle worth losing the war?  Will getting even make anything better?  A dead man can’t fight the long battle, and some fights are worth dying for.  A gun to my head is easier to respond to than a slow systemic robbery that is crippling my life and my family.

The small passive aggressive attacks lead people to believe even the normal problems of life are part of a plot against them.  Convolution of what is a real attack and what is just life makes knowing when to fight and the level of force to use proportionally difficult.  Being attacked on multiple levels in different ways could lead some to take big swings just to stay above water.  They might lash out against the wrong people and might respond in the wrong ways without knowing the full story.  Knowing all this doesn’t make knowing when to fight easier.

I guess my belief is just to find appropriate ways to blow off steam.  When other people are being hurt stand up for them.  Also realize that everyone misses somethings.  Also realize that what is humorous to some is gasoline and a match to others.  Also realize without looking at things in a humorous way some people might want to burn everything down.  Laughter is medicine that can save a lot of lives.

It is not always easy to discern the line with humor.  The idea that the same levels should be used for all people in all situations is problematic.  Even the inflection of someone’s voice can rape someone with the wrong health problems.  That doesn’t mean everyone should have to speak monotone around everyone.

Treat other’s as they wish to be treated is hard.  It is also a bit idealistic.  If we are too afraid of stepping on each other’s toes we won’t talk.  When people don’t talk divide and control becomes much easier for an enemy.  When rage is left to fester it makes people less likely to want to talk.  Who wants to be yelled at?  When we just talk at surface level and never about the deeper issues, anger and injustice can be like a rolling snowball.  Speaking to each other on deeper levels opens people up to being hurt.  Nobody wants to be hurt so they put up a protective shield.  Some people don’t want to be communicated to because their anger has been left to fester.  Trying to talk with them is not how they wish to be treated.  Maybe at deeper issue they want the issues resolved and so actually speaking with them is the way to stop the anger from festering.  Health problems like mentioned above can make this line much more difficult to discern.  So people have different ways of trying to solve this problem.  Some will go silent thinking God will sort this out.  Other’s push to hard an alienate and increase the resentment by confirming that people don’t listen to them.  I have been punished in life for both.  So if staying silent doesn’t work at times, the middle ground doesn’t work at times, and pushing to hard doesn’t work at times.  It is easy to become disenfranchised with the whole process.  

I think what we all have to remember is doing the right thing doesn’t always make things better.  Life is more than the sum of our own actions.  The idea that this problem is centralized only to my life would be unlikely.  So if we realize that for some people doing what is right doesn’t work always, it should be easier to forgive them.  Not saying we shouldn’t try to do the right thing, just that when people fail us it should be pretty easy to understand why.  It is also a powerful tool of the Devil to make us think we are making the wrong choice when we are making the right ones.

The truth of my life is it would be easy for people to judge me for things they don’t understand.  They might have limited capacity and likely are missing the many things below the surface.  It is difficult to learn to not to be quick to judgement.  We are given limited information.  My desire to stand up for what is right and protect the innocent blinded me in younger years to say overly harsh things.  My knowledge in older years has given me more perspective albeit it might prevent me from acting as fast as required in some situations.  Way I see it, if people are in trouble get them out of it.  Have a great preference for methods that can be undone later as information and truth can evolve with time.  Nobody wants to finally see the clearer picture and realize someone didn’t need to die, someone didn’t need to be tortured, someone didn’t need to sit in jail all those years.

Not that I was ever part of the FBI or NSA etc but it probably is a bad idea to give surveillance unchecked to intel people early in life.  An ambitious young spirit, trying to prove their way, given limited information and false alarms could leave the wrong people in jail or worse.  Law enforcement has no less impact on lives than doctors.  At their best they can save many lives and keep us all from hurting each other.  Even the good ones miss the mark sometimes just like doctors.  So I would rather celebrate their contribution to society than hate them for what they miss.  

There is systematic problems we need to fix, and keeping the conversation open and honest is vital to their success as well.  Problem is with systemic oppression the conversation breaks down.  The idea that law enforcement or doctors are perfect and infallible is wrong, they aren’t gods.  That doesn’t mean they aren’t highly valuable and needed in society.  If one person’s brakes fail we don’t throw out all the mechanics.  

Knowing who to trust with what when and how much is a difficult task.  I suppose I should be a little more understanding though when my life is made hell on earth do they expect me to just go silently into the night?

Speaking these truths can be difficult and dangerous.  It would be unwise to think everyone can, would, or should.  I think the more people that say this the better and I also realize in a fallen world with leverage and the ability for anyone’s words to be taken out of context some that agree might refrain from speaking up.  I wish we lived in a world where everyone felt they could speak freely and everyone would use that ability to encourage and affirm each other toward the good for all.  I thought that living in the USA that is what we have.  Maybe some have had it for certain times in USA history, though our failure to guarantee and protect that for all people might have led us to lose it.

I think it was John Stuart that once said “we have free speech, not consequence free speech.”  Maybe it wasn’t him that said it.  The problem is this feels like leverage.  Maybe this is a more truthful way to look at how we treat free speech in the USA.  This has been the impression of experiences in my life from 2010 to 2020.

Maybe nobody ever reads this.  I hope it can possibly give insight to those who might want to know me in the future.  I love our country and wish we could find a way to make all our people’s lives around the world prosperous and filled with joy, wonder, hope and faith.  I feel like our country is missing the mark loving and caring for each other, and I don’t mean that in the wrong way.  Not to disregard or disrespect all the good that has been done in 2020 and my life has had many of the same experiences this year as I have had the last 10 years.

Seems like people want me to lose hope.  This I refuse.  I want people in my life.  I want to know who I can trust with what information.  I want to know people that aren’t constantly telling me only part of the truth.  It is one thing to only have a few people in your life on the level.  It is miserable to feel like everyone in your life won’t level with you.  

Probably how cops feel sometimes.  Nobody wants to tell them the truth because they are afraid they will throw them or someone they care about in jail.  For example in my own life I didn’t want cops around the pool because having someone with a gun seems to raise tensions.  Maybe if they had clubs I would feel a bit safer.  I don’t want anyone in jail and I want clean drinking water and safe bridges to drive over.  Making that reality is a bit more difficult in practice and that is the ideal that I aspire to.  Some might be too dangerous to be out of jail, though my guess is many times that is due to the failures in society around them.  Knowing that I would like to make our jails and prisons more comfortable for all.  We might not be able to repair the injustice of leaving innocent people in prison for years but we can at least make it about protecting the public and not making their lives a living hell.  Maybe as lie detectors get better we can allow people to fight their cases quicker.  Being left in jail without a trial sucks.  Being blamed for something you don’t know sucks too.

Further a person that can contribute to society is worth more out of jail than in jail.  It is imperative to us as a society to help protect people’s lives so they have the ability to do so.  There are many reason why people get into a mess, some which are more than the sum of their own choices.  We all make mistakes and we all need emotional support, health, a roof over our heads, food to eat, and transportation.  Take away any of those and your going to wind up with problems.  So curing that seems more wise than making people out to be mentally ill.  

You don’t want to see the guy on top of the skyscraper jump?  Don’t take way all their emotional support.  Want that guy to be more productive at work?  Get him decent healthcare.  Don’t want that guy roaming the streets? Give him a place to live and food to eat.  People can abuse this but the potential for abuse does not outweigh the value of support.

Water pipeline from Antarctica to help with water shortages in Africa

Organization to fund medical research and pay doctors and researchers real salaries.   Company created for solving public problems that is apart from trying to drive profit.

Develop a drug then release to the public at cost.  Transparency throughout pipeline.  Probably something like this already, but why don’t I know about it.  Underpaying staff might turn away talent.  Social reward outweighs high profits.  Music that relates vs music that only sells.

More companies that believe in protecting all people.

Possible electoral college with racial and gender groups as well.  Maybe elect one male and one female for each racial group with each state for electoral college.  This could give minorities more of a vote.  Probably been thought of before.

What excuses are there for minimizing my life?  We are in a world with potential for everything to be destroyed.  Yet we have avoided that.  How?  With the level of oppression, evils, and destabilized systems.  The voices on the screen lead one to believe that some of this is made up.  Doesn’t make sense, maybe we are past all that.  I don’t doubt technologies could exist that could destroy everything.  I don’t think the people that are in charge of that technology are treating people right.  This begs the question why anyone’s life is left in the have not.  Maybe popularity is the distinguishing factor.  Popular to like some people unpopular to like others.  Seems a bit absurd.

I care about people and try to protect people then I get this in life.  I try to be tolerant of others and caring and silence.  I am willing to sacrifice myself time and time again, and silence.  Who determined that leaving me this way was a value added proposition.  I want to make others lives better yet I seem to get the opposite.  This doesn’t really lend itself to trusting that a loving God actually gives two shits about me.

All to turn me into what?  It’s clear that my life is being planned.  Or maybe I was just binned to protect other’s opportunities.  Not for any other reason than those with more power control.  Wasting my time and waisting my life.

Let me be clear, I am not a racist.  I am sinful and through omission like any person I can fail people.  I have had racists thoughts before, I admit that sin and have asked God for forgiveness.  It is difficult to perfect being able to not have preconceived notions about any person on earth.  Skin is one difference in life, to say it doesn’t help speak to nationality, culture, or mindsets would be unwise.

A Russian accent and white skin might lend itself to someone being Russian and might not.  Makeup and accent elimination classes can change impressions.  I understand people get unfairly grouped by life’s struggles and I want them to have a safe route out of the shit storms they are in.  To say it isn’t a battle to think better of people that are different from you would be a lie.  Specially if someone from a group has hurt you in the past.  

Can you really blame an African American man or woman from distrusting a system that promoted slavery and now makes decisions that still leave part of their population impoverished?  If you were an orphan and saw others with great family lives and opportunities you could only dream of, what kind of thoughts would go through their head.  If you were passed up for positions based on your gender continuously, after seeing your mother’s and grandmother’s sidelined by the men in their life that were supposed to protect them, how would that make you feel?  If your family member was hurt by someone in a group that you will never be a part of, that seems to lend itself to misplacing anger towards a group.

Let me be clear, I have made a lot of mistakes.  I have said the wrong words, at the wrong time, in the wrong way.  I have to fight having preconceived notions about anyone.  I have systematically been hurt by many women in my life.  I should be wise enough to derive some knowledge about how I deal with women and relationships.  

It is difficult to disconnect the bad actions that are probably due to many understandable reasons, some obvious and some unknown from how I choose to interact with women in society.  I want women to be happy, healthy, and successful.  I don’t want to annoy with my presence and I don’t want anyone feeling left out in the cold.  I don’t want to hurt their relationships with other men by my friendship.  I would like to have a relationship and how to properly balance having a social presence that both respects her and the other people in my life is difficult.  One side of the spectrum ends with excessive drinking and other sins that destroy relationships.  On another side of the spectrum people feel suffocated and trapped feeling like just going out to a restaurant creates unacceptable opportunities for problems.

I would want the woman in my life to have other friends.  I wouldn’t want her to use them as a way for me to be continuously insulted and demoralized.  I wouldn’t want her to be disconnected from society if I died.  I wouldn’t want the woman in my life having inappropriate close friendships with other men or women.  All people have the chance to let you down or cause problems.  

Having someone that is willing to help others is amazing.  If she lets the wrong people in and I can’t trust her to get out at the right time that’s a problem.  I want a woman who knows the potential for her own weakness and mine.  A partner that doesn’t lead me to hubris.  I want to feel respected and confident, not prideful and arrogant.  I can’t say I have really met anyone on the same page with me on all that as of yet.  Someone strong enough to speak up to me if I am being a tyrant, someone loving enough to know we are all unsure at times.  

I wouldn’t want a woman that didn’t lie to me, I would want one that never felt like she needed to.  That is a big ask on myself and society as well to create that kind of environment.  From what I see now in society, not much can be trusted and I never know who is listening.

I guess in a woman after attraction I would be looking more for the way she thinks.  Maybe the belief that all these attributes are in one woman is hubris in itself.  Maybe I am asking too much of one person.  I believe people can be better with support.  We all still fall very short of ideal.  I say all this now after waking up choking and hacking.  Feeling a bit like a piece of glass these days.  So I might be saying this for someone else which is ok.

It is wrong to label anyone for life.  People change and we are all works in progress.

Maybe a country with less oppression could offer Lebanon protection.  Not sure that is us at this point.  Could have been caused by people overthrowing the government.  Maybe the government needed to be overthrown, I don’t know enough about the situation.

Leadership is difficult. Too lenient and people get hurt.  Too stringent and people are oppressed and people get hurt.  Hurting people have a tendency towards corruption.  People are generally hurting after a regime change.  How do you find the team of people who’s puts aside self interest when they can’t pay their medical bills.  People that feel wrongly taken out of power can be a threat later.  People that are motivated by self interest (possibly with good reason, like family starving, possibly bad reason power grab) might challenge power.  Everyone has the potential to be corrupted by power, everyone has the potential of marching in hubris thinking they are the only one that has it right.  

People taking on corrupt practices have to be stopped and you cannot remove everyone or blame them too harshly when times are so hard.  Leaders unfairly create poster children – third party profiteers might be using a tactic to forward their cause.  Get the greedy leader to punish the starving orphan.  Popularity isn’t always the right way to go, though sometimes it might be the easier way.  This can have both positive and negative results.  Fixing a problem for the short term might create larger problems in the long term.  Fixing a problem for the long term might not get people past the short term.  People can try to trap you in words and in actions.  People have a general propensity to think that their experiences give them the correct knowledge of how best to solve a problem.

This is only my option based on my life experiences and the pictures I see on the wall. I would really like to believe it is better out there for everyone than all this.

 Remember some people can win the lottery.  Some people can lose just as dramatically.  Some people that win don’t deserve it and some people that lose don’t deserve it.  Grace, Love, and Mercy is not something we earn or deserve and we all need it sometimes.  When that truth is realized reconciliation is easier and harsh judgment harder.  So if someone cheats on me I should forgive them.  Doesn’t mean it doesn’t change things and I should still want the best for them in life.  Finding a humble partner in life is wise.  Pride and hubris might make them think going up to that hotel room for another drink is fine “they can handle it”.  Just innocent flirting, no bid deal?  Sometimes the mistakes don’t happen if we don’t think we are above making them ourselves.  A couple drinks, someone slipping someone drugs, health problems, could all make people think that is a better idea.  A family could be ruined by a third party.  Ideally people shouldn’t have to deal with all these problems just to go have a drink at a bar.  Seems that is not the case in this world.  

Sadly the potential for some opportunities present themselves in places that have options for more dubious behavior.  The beach can give a day of fun for a lot of people.  It also creates opportunities for those not watching closely enough.  Overly controlling people can create the same problem.  Feeling like your suffocating can lead you anywhere in search of air.  Nobody likes to feel trapped and nobody wants to lose their partner to the roll of the dice.  Finding that balance is difficult.  Even the most trustworthy person could likely make a mistake due to winning the wrong kind of lotto.  Nobody deserves to be another person’s doormat either.

My advice would be if something is a one time thing and the person is repentant forgive them.  Ideally we would make better choices going forward, though external factors might have been the cause in which case the initial choices really didn’t matter.  If the choices were the problem, then make sure we are making better ones in the future.  If people insist on making same choices that are rolling the dice against the relationship.  If the message has been said and communicated effectively, part paths vs being a doormat.  Pray that God give someone the right words to say to them before it gets to that point.  Don’t be legalistic on this, telling something to someone resentfully or passive aggressively won’t make things better.  Don’t hold their mistakes against them and don’t be afraid to call it how it is.  Just make sure whatever you say is out of love and not resentment.  Also remember people change and grow over time.  Don’t hold past resentment and be careful of the words you use to describe the situation at the time.

Don’t listen to once a cheater always a cheater.  Like saying once a liar always a liar.  Also don’t use that as an excuse to cheat, not everyone is so forgiving in this world.

Why aren’t we using AI to save people from poverty?  It is clear that as time goes on to stay competitive in a global market place that has access to AI and robotics jobs are going to be eventually lost on a large scale.  Corporate greed and profits of capitalism do not account for this.  We can throw some nails in the tires but this will not stop the progress.  Advances in medicine are great if you can actually pay for the healthcare.  Advances in production lines are great if you can still put food on the table.

Technology has good and bad sides.  Solving one problem can create other problems.  Being a hard worker and doing right by people should be enough.  It is not anymore.  Corporations have two options.  Protect jobs and prevent automation.  This might save jobs short term, but others in the market are likely to overtake them.  Amazon and Walmart are good examples of this.  In a global market place USA companies have a harder time to compete.  You add enough hardships on keeping the company afloat, they will take the path that lets them keep existing.  Though with the speed at which changes are happening CEOs might see that 5 years down the line their company is likely to not exist.  A good CEO would let their workforce know this and at the same time that might accelerate the decline of the company.

That is tough, knowing you can protect a few jobs for a year, or less jobs for 5 years.  Changes are coming, staying competitive requires us to keep evolving, and without a shift in how we do things the profitability margins will keep getting smaller.  More children in High School and still the same number of football teams.

Ideally life should get easier as we become more advanced and older.  That is the opposite of what I see in our country.  We get less jobs and increases in surveillance to the point it destroys friendships and relationships.  We get the bad of being a celebrity without the good.  The company with the best AI eventually wins in Capitalism.  Maximizing profits to the point all competitors are eliminated.  Likely that is when the disgruntled competition walks into the data center with a computer virus.  Most companies have backups though, so that might slightly delay the inevitable.  Further if you do take out a company another might be next in line to take their place.  That is why we should force companies to pay more to protect society.  Problem is the US government has a significant amount of corruption in it and the money still doesn’t get to all the people that need it.

Maybe the real AI uses Amazon or Walmart as a figure head.  It realizes that people will need a place to channel their anger.

AI to accelerate speed of processors.  4000 years for man to come up with AI.  Far less time for AI to come up with something even higher.

We keep seeing better and better technology.  The prices keep going up.  The more people that lose their jobs the less people can afford.  Convergence in technologies reduces the amount of products we need which eliminates more jobs.  This obfuscates whether things are getting better or worse.  The new Electric Hummer seems incredible and almost everything someone would want in a car.  It is priced above 100000 though.  It is not that it is overpriced for what it is, it is that it is overpriced for the masses.  If only a few people in society get to have things that are that nice while at the same time people are losing their jobs and can’t put food on their table, it builds a high level of resentment.

Society is accelerating towards this.  More jobs will be lost and fewer people will be able to afford nicer things in life.  Loan based economics can allow someone to start a new business or help weather a storm in life.  Loans becoming so easy allows housing pricing and car prices to be increase dramatically.  We move from a tool used to help weather storms to a tool to enslave masses.   Oppression and other evils in societies can pull out the rug from under a person right after they get a loan.  With the amount of surveillance and attempts to control politics this moves from possible to what is actually being done.  So is the loan there to help weather the storm, or is the storm there to put on the chains?  It is a bit sickening to think about this is the way the world works now.  Probably wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t seen it myself.

This will likely set ourselves up for foreign investment.  Too much foreign investment and control can shift power in a society.  Even foreign investors with the best intentions could be leveraged in the future, by their governments or even ours.

My basic thoughts are don’t take out loans.  Help each other so the storms of life don’t encourage your friends and family to take out loans.  For those that wind up in debt help them out of it, as it might be others causing the storm. Prevent each other from causing the storms in each other’s lives.  Don’t allow advertising in society for loans.  Don’t encourage people to buy things they can’t afford.  Problem is if everyone in society doesn’t think this way, prices can continue to be artificially inflated.  Just because we say slavery doesn’t exist, does mean it does not.   Slavery isn’t limited to one racial group.  

Maybe this is the way a society keeps a work force.  If we only had to pay for property tax and food, the masses might not want to work.  A workforce that is too comfortable might be easily overtaken by those that have had to work harder to survive.  Complacency and apathy leaves ground to oppression.  If few are not complacent and apathetic then those could be removed by more dubious methods.  So in the end if we aren’t protecting each other and if we leave it only to a few to speak up when something isn’t right we are likely setting ourselves up for failure.  If we don’t have mercy our appreciation for other types of oppression in life we will create more oppression and people won’t speak up when it counts.

I can say all this.  I can come up with thoughts to try to fix the problems.  That said, what says it best – empty skyscrapers and people on the streets.

The software I am seeing appears to have critical features missing as an attempt to waste my time.  Don’t sell me cars without wheels.  Then I am trapped into payment models.  I like supporting projects working towards creating new tools.  I don’t like having my money taken by code that is supposed to be production ready released to the App Store wasting my time.  I realize people are trying to make money and a living.  Doesn’t mean it is wise to release half baked software.  Too many artificial limits on Apple Platform right now.  Maybe this is all just a product of corruption in the system.  Maybe there needs to be a go fund me in the App Store for test bed projects.  People can support the project and realize the project isn’t the same as prime time pro code.  It is not that there are missing features it’s that I feel like I was sold on more than it actually is.  I like playing incredible games like Asphalt 9.  I don’t like my tools being artificially limited so I can’t create on the same level.  A paint brush and a canvas might be the difference between a child taking the wrong path in life.  Teach children to express themselves in nonviolent ways or another person might hand them a gun and a bag of drugs to help fill that void.  Giving them broken paint brushes and torn up canvases is one way to route them to other methods.  

I seem to think the same way on sanctions.  Starving people and crippling their tools seems more likely to start wars than stop them.  I am not trying to hide something and I am not trying to build nukes underground.  There is a difference between stopping wars and crippling a mans everyday activities for sport.  Crippling people’s health temporarily is not wisdom.  Don’t use my last statement as an excuse to take them out.

Maybe my problem is believing people want to stop wars.  Lots of money in building weapons to take lives.  Would be nice to see lots of money put into tools to save lives.  Not money wasted on artificially inflated prices.  Probably should be profit limits on medical supplies.  To have a system like that though you have to get all the corruption out of the system.  We can build roads without corruption with the right protection.  

We should be able to do the same with a medical system.  We might need to write amendments to always protect human life including the unborn.  We might need to write amendments to prevent intelligence agencies and governments from ever using that medical system as a weapon.  As it stands right now there is too much corruption in the system to effectively do this.  Doesn’t mean we shouldn’t create a public healthcare system, it means we have to sweep up all the corruption and oppression in the system.  Creating a system that promotes mercy and love over vengeance will go a long way in sweeping some of this up.

We don’t not build roads because people might build them with faulty building materials.  We build the roads and stop the corruption in the system.  We make sure we have good support networks so people don’t turn to corruption out of desperation.

Companies don’t have to supply water to themselves and maintain their own wells.  Offloading healthcare from companies free them up to more closely concentrate on their tasks at hand.  Of course how do we get here with a fading environment and a mountain of debt.

I like to be protected.  I like to be kept healthy.  I like to have energy.  I like to feel inspired. I like to be entertained.  I like to be encouraged.  I like to feel loved.  I like to feel like part of the team.  I like to feel like I am adding value.  I like having real hope.  I like to have a roof over my head and food on my table.  I like having the right tools to do the job.  I like not being limited to one field or one position in life.  I like having friends.  I like having opportunities for love.  I like being forgiven when I have made a mistake.  I like knowing what I have missed.  I like winning sometimes.  I like a good joke and I don’t like to be made fun of.  I like to work with others.  I like living in peace with other nations.  I like having a system where I feel like I can tell the truth without winding up in front of a firing squad.  I like when people speak up if they think we are about to drive off a cliff.  I like reconciling quickly.

I don’t like to be a doormat.  I don’t like my health taken from me to prove a point.  I don’t like being manipulated.  I don’t like being strung along.  I like my tools not to be messed with.   I don’t like being controlled by bad contracts.  I don’t like being forced to agree with something.  I don’t like being left at my mom’s house with no job and bad health for some political end.  I don’t like being put out on the street.  I don’t like being blamed for my failures and not being given a hand up.  I don’t like losing all the time.  I like my hard work to matter.  I don’t want to be handed a victory I didn’t earn, I don’t want to lose on a technicality, and I don’t want every win in life require me to earn it.  The last sentence defies logic a bit but I think God in heaven knows what I am saying.  I don’t like people preventing me from working.  I don’t like my friends, brothers, and sisters dying on the battlefield.  I don’t want anyone nailed to crosses or tortured for that matter.  I don’t like being left for years to think about the mistakes I have made as a lesson.

Now treat others like that.  Simple huh? (sarcasm).  Difficult but not impossible.  Without the help of God and others, improbable.  None of this is possible without love and reconciliation.

When you are working out and lifting weights you never know if you might be sidelined soon.  For men like myself lifting weightlifting was a nice way to get out aggression.  It is probably wise to learn other techniques as well for removing aggression and blowing off steam.  

In my younger life I spoke very freely without realizing some of the pain it could cause.  As life went on I learned how hurtful some words could be and how unforgiving society can be.  This made me more silent.  Silence can lead to people not speaking up when it counts.  It had became clear that I was under heavy surveillance which led me to not trust anyone.  If people talk too freely without regard for the pain they can cause people can get hurt.  

Not everyone has each other’s best interest at heart so letting the wrong people know all you know is not wise.  On the flip side too much surveillance, people you don’t know if you can trust around you, and what seems like oppressive changes in the system make you not want to speak at all.  Silence can let good people suffer or people to be blamed for things they did not do.  

Alternating people between these kind of environments one where people don’t have to be afraid to speak and one where the wrong word gets you killed is likely to cause problems.  Some people have to interact in both these types of environments just to survive.

The idea that the law and the system doesn’t have evil in it is a mistake.  When we allow excessive surveillance we could solve a lot of problems if we could trust those with that information to not misuse it.  Part of the problem with Governments and technologies is that information can stick around and then be used to hurt parts of the population when the wrong leader gets in charge later in life.  We should probably have laws that delete records of surveillance after a short time.  What was popular 5 years ago might get people hurt today.  Surveillance can prevent monsters and if used irresponsibly can create them.

Back to the original idea here.  I was moved from having the ability to vent in speech, lifting weights, and talking with friends slowly to a place where I had the ability to do none.  Mechanisms that I had to channel aggression were removed from my life and I did not initially have other tools in my tool belt to blow off steam.  So learning more tools to combat aggression and vent steam is wise.  I have also had a ton more provocations to anger, so extra tools to vent can go from a nice to have to a necessity in certain environments.

Think magic tricks vs a thunderstorm. They both change things. A slight of hand can appear to change the laws of physics, they can produce light and sound. Thunderstorms produce light and sound yet the heavy distortion is more noticeable and instead of thinking about the individual components like rains and clouds we think about the storm as a whole. I am not sure the analogy perfectly applies but you can make up your mind on that after reading the paragraph below.

Slight distortion can be worse than heavy distortion.  With slight distortion the meaning can be changed yet the new meaning is still discernible.  With heavy distortion the individual slight warps can give way to the overall sound.  Though when different things have slight warps those individual changes can be perceived at once making things terrifying.  One car in front of you with a word play fuck you and street signs buildings, etc together in concert.  Do we have randomly generated license plate numbers or has cyber security problems led us to printing a giant set of fuck yous to the general population.  Now how do we unbrainwash an entire population that has been trained with double meanings and double entendres?  The odd thing is I didn’t pick up on any of this until later in life.  Timed correctly all this could do some real damage to people.  Creative word play with a friend might be a little fun, creative word play on mass scale can make people miserable or get people killed.  Completely ignoring it could be one solution but ignoring this all could hurt the more impressionable.  Drugs and alcohol can make people more susceptible to it as well. Seeing all this can make life a lot more difficult.  Not knowing about it can make people blame you for things you don’t understand.  All this together can drive people to other specific companies giving them a monopoly.  That monopoly could have a kill switch in their product.  So feels kind of like damned if you do damned if you don’t.  The Devil is in the details but so is God.  A bit difficult to see it though.  Maybe some of the names are trying to protect from an oppressive system.  Maybe we reduce the oppression in the system and the word play will get a bit nicer.